I have not made a Christmas Wish List in years. I haven't celebrated Christmas in years. It isn't that I hate the holiday, I just hate the way that I feel around this time of year. I have had no reason to celebrate for a very long time and I have been alone for a very long time. It is easier to push it to the back of my mind and just treat it like another day, rather than admit that I am lonely. But this year, I have much to be thankful for and much to celebrate, still I find myself a bit melancholy still.
Wish one - a heavy bag and boxing gloves. I am disabled in just about every other way, but I can still use my upper body.
Wish two - tangible, physical affection from my partner. I miss it and crave it.
Wish three - Answers. For both myself and for my partner regarding our health. I pray for forward momentum and progress, instead of this infernal stagnation that we have been treading water in.
Wish four - I pray for fidelity, loyalty and honest love for all of those that do not have it. I see brothers mistreating their partners, being dishonest and being disloyal. It breaks my heart. I will abide by the rules and I will keep my mouth shut, but I will pray relentlessly for their hearts to be touched by the Lord and for them to become "real men" in the eyes of the maker.
I am not big on public opinion. I despise liars and cheats.
Lord forgive them, fore they know not what they do.