Happiness lost...

When did happiness get lost? Do you remember the exact moment that it slipped away? I can not recall when it went, but I know that it is gone. I am miserable and have no one but myself to blame. I have let the insecure, selfish actions of others dictate my existence. When did I become less of who I am and more of who I am not nor wish to ever be? I am not weak, I am not meager, I am not spiteful or mean, I am not jealous nor possessive...however neurotic I may be, lol. So how in the world do I get back to me and still live in this life that I have chosen? Stay tuned, maybe I will figure it out.